Maybe if he’d stop gawping for air for a hearty chuckle every four words…

Speak Jackass Transcript

This is a transcript of the December 23rd, 2025, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Green and Blue are having a friendly conversation and Green regales Blue with a story about being followed around a grocery store.

Green: Haha, oh, man, so… the guy kept following me around the store right? Meanwhile I am just like, “dude, I just want my Captain Crunch.” Haha.

Panel Two

Blue stares passively and Green continues.

Green: So I am him what’s up, right, and haha, he’s like “did you go to Riverside High?”

Panel Three

Green continues the story.

Green: So, haha, I am like, “yeah, class of ’05” and it turned out we had the same homeroom. Haha. So, anyway…”

Panel Four

Blue’s inner thoughts revealed.

Caption: Meanwhile, in Blue’s brain:

Blue: Should I tell him he sounds like a fucking donkey?

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The Blue one speaks for all of us.

The New Normal? Transcript

This is a transcript of the March 2, 2023, RGBots comic.

Panel One

A close crop on Red as he glances around.

Red: Notice a refreshing lack of conflict now that Green is dead?

Panel Two

The camera pulls back. Red is talking to Blue.

Red: It’s like we can finally just talk.

Panel Three

Red glances up at Blue.

Red: You know? Have a conversation?

Panel Four

Blue backs away.

Blue: Fuck that and fuck you.

Some people need to learn when to shut up.

Chatterbox Transcript

This is a transcript of the May 3, 2022, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Blue approaches Red.

Blue: Hey Red, what’s up?

Panel Two

Blue holds up an arm in protest.

Red: Actually, quite a lot, I’ve had a rough couple of days and-

Blue: Hold up.

Panel Three

Blue stares at Red.

Blue: The question was intended as a greeting, not an invitation.

Panel Four

Green approaches.

Green: Hey, what’s up?

Blue: Don’t get him started.