Next week: Killer tomatoes.

Feast or Farming Transcript

This is a transcript of the August 11th, 2026 RGBots comic.

Panel One

Green sits at the RGBots News desk. The story card reads “Peter Piper Picked a Pickled Plague?”

Green: Welcome to RGBots News, I am your anchor, Green.

Panel Two

Green conveys the lead story. A caption has a link to a CNN Story about Taylor Farms.

Green: More troubling news from Taylor Farms this week following several recalls, most recently involving avocados and jalapeños. Mexican food fans continue to suffer.

Caption: www.cnn.com/2026/08/10/salmonella-jalapeno-taylor-farms

Panel Three

Green hands the broadcast over.

Green: For the latest in this ongoing health crisis, we turn to Blue at the scene. Blue?

Blue: Thank you, Green.

Panel Four

Blue continues the news segment.

Blue: It has been reported that the dead are beginning to rise after consuming Taylor Farms produce and having brief, sudden bouts of terminal illnesses. The US Food and Drug Administration’s current advice is to “not worry about it.” I saw a farmworker eat a man, Green.

You can ask the RGBots a question any time you’d like, and they may answer it in a comic! You can help support the comic with donations and subscriptions to the webhost.

THIS COMIC IS FOR SEX-HAVERS ONLY IF YOU HAVE NOT HAD SEX GO BACK TO ROBLOX

Malawareness Transcript

This is a transcript of the February 20th, 2026, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Red and Green and discussing dating.

Green: I went on a date with a cute tablet last night.

Red: That sounds nice.

Panel Two

Green leans in, emphasizing the implication of his phrasing.

Green: We even “interfaced” if you get my meaning.

Red: You went port-to-port?

Green: Hell yeah.

Panel Three

Green seems a bit worried.

Green: But I think they might have had a irus.

Red: Should have had protection dude.

Panel Four

Green is embarrassed.

Green: I know, I’ve been getting pop-ups.

You can ask the RGBots a question any time you’d like and they may answer it in a comic! You can help support the comic with donations and subscriptions to the webhost.

The only problem is that all the tape and glue are sample sizes.

Budget Medical Transcript

This is a transcript of the January 6th, 2026, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Red is discussing his insurance woes with Blue.

Red: I hate that my insurance premiums went up. This is so damn awful for everyone.

Blue: You still have insurance? In this economy?

Panel Two

Red continues, but is caught off guard by Blue’s question.

Red: I don’t know for how much longer, but yes. Wait, what do you do? Pay out of pocket for everything?

Panel Three

Blue reveals her method. Red is confused.

Blue: I use Dollar Tree.

Panel Four

Blue details her medical care and insurance alternative.

Blue: If something pops out, I glue it back in. If something splits, I tape it together. Glue and tape are cheap at the Dollar Tree.

You can ask the RGBots a question any time you’d like and they may answer it in a comic! You can help support the comic with donations and subscriptions to the webhost.

Nine times? This isn’t a competition.

What’s Trending – COVID Transcript

This is a transcript of the December 27, 2021 RGBots comic.

Panel One: Green scrolls through his cellphone.

Green: If you have legitimately had COVID nine times then you cease to be classified as human.

Panel Two: Green addresses the viewer.

Green: You are now labeled as an incubator.
Scientists will be picking you up shortly.

Excrelscior!

Rumbly in the Tumbly

This is a transcript of the March 4, 2021, RGBots comic.

Panel One:

Green is leaning toward Red.

Green: I am worried about my digestive health.

Red: Why is that?

Panel Two:

Green, still leaning in toward Red, has a finger under his lip in thought.

Green: It’s mostly due to my asshole. It keeps talking to me.

Panel Three:

Green places his hands on his hips. Red looks on.

Red: What? Really? What could it possibly be saying?

Panel Four:

Green’s eyes take up the whole panel.

Green: A lot of shit.