Same wormshit, different day.

#Dune director Denis Villeneuve on the MCU

"There are too many Marvel movies that are nothing more than a cut and paste of others"

(via @elmundoes) pic.twitter.com/78Lav1Iike

— ScreenTime (@screentime) September 16, 2021

The Spicy takes must flow… Transcript

This is the transcript for the Sept 16, 2021 RGBots

Panel One

Red is glancing off-screen as he talks about his topic for the comic today.

Red: So, Denis Villeneuve is the latest director to have a go at Marvel Studios’ movies.

Panel Two

Red continues.

Red: His comment was “there are too many Marvel movies that are nothing more than a cut and paste of others.” His opinion is perfectly fine and not inaccurate, but I always find this line of criticism hilarious.

Panel Three

We zoom in closer on Red.

Red: Formulas work because they are successful. So, it’s kind of a weird way to frame that these Marvel Studios movies are super successful because they have cracked the crowd-pleasing formula and are beloved.

Panel Four

Red glances at the reader.

Red: Just nobody tell him about the “hero’s journey” that is all over Dune, his next movie, an adaptation of a popular and influential science fiction novel.

Christopher Nolan can eat my green robot ass, too.

Mad at the Movies Transcript

This is the transcript for the Sept 2, 2021 RGBots

Panel One

Green sits at the desk with his hands folder, delivering a statement.

Green: So, Patty Jenkins said some shit about streaming releases looking fake and I am getting so fucking over theatrical experience diehards. Her quote was: “Aren’t you seeing it? All of the films that streaming services are putting out, I’m sorry, they look like fake movies to me. I don’t hear about them, I don’t read about them. it’s not working as a model for establishing legendary greatness.”*

Panel Two

Green raises a finger in emphasis. He braces himself against his desk.

Green: it all smacks of elitist horseshit to me. Trying to devalue one platform in favor of one that has been losing relevance. But it also implies that people that turn to streaming to make and view things are also inherently lesser.

Panel Three

Green raises his arm in anger as he hunches over his desk.

Green: Sorry I don’t have a fucking billion dollars to make a mediocre Wonder Woman sequel and some of us would rather be able to watch movies from the controlled environment of our homes.

Panel Four

Green raises in his arm, frantic with rage.

Green: Lock me up for murdering cinema.

Source: screenrant.com/patty-jenkins-streaming-service-original-movies-response/

Why would anyone think that the problems with the movie would be solved by… adding more of the source?

Like A Wet Fart

This is a transcript of the March 9, 2021, RGBots comic.

Panel One:

Red and Blue stand facing each other in conversation.

Red: So, the Zack Snyder cut of Justice League is coming out next week.
Are you going to watch it?

Panel Two:

We are closer to both bots.

Blue: No, I doubt I will.

Red: Why Not?

Panel Three:

Blue stands alone, with one arm raised and looking skyward.

Blue: Hm.
How to explain. . .

Panel Four:

Blue’s face, such as it is, is in close up.

Blue: I already took a two-hour shit before. . . why would I want to take a four-hour version?

Jesus, Blue. Calm down.

Indiana Jones and the Sexual Awakening

This is a transcript of the March 2, 2021, RGBots comic.

Panel One:

Blue stands looking at the viewer.

Blue: Remember that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade where Indiana Jones chokes that Nazi lady?

Panel Two:

We are slightly closer to Blue

Blue: Harrison Ford’s thick, rugged fingers gripped around her delicate throat?

Panel Three:

We are in Blue’s “face” as it were.

Blue: Him dwarfing her as she is completely in his grasp, staring up at him?

Panel Four:

We have thankfully backed away from Blue.

Blue: Because I sure do.

It is a conversation that is happening all across America.

It is a conversation we need to have.

Hawk shit, box office hits.

Good Neighbots Make Good Electric Fences Transcript

The following is a transcript for this RGBots comic.

Panel One

Red addresses an unknown individual, but presumably a robot.

Red: Howdy, neighbor. You don’t know me, but I know you. I’m a shit-hawker.

Panel Two

Red makes his pitch.

Red: I hawk shit, an’ I’ve been at it ’bout twenty years now. Now, you may notice I ain’t got anything with me. I’m sold out.

Panel Three

Red asks for ideas.

Red: So what I need right now is another heapin’ helpin’ o’ bullshit to hawk to rubes from coast to coast. So, please, tell me which early-2000s movie I should remake.

Panel Four

It was Green he was talking to the whole time!

Green: Reindeer Games, but with an older, puffier Ben Affleck!