True story. That shit really happened.

Shit Gets Real Transcript

This is a transcript of the March 3rd, 2026, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Green is playing a video game. He is recalling an incident from early in the day.

Green: Someone forgot to flush the toilet in the restroom today.

Panel Two

Green considers what he saw. It was not pleasant.

Green: It looked like a stew pot with two big, chunky carrots in it. Cartoonishly large and bright orange.

Panel Three

Green returns his focus to his game.

Panel Four

Green suddenly grows somber.

Green: I hope they see a doctor.

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Of course, we’re gonna share the video.

Routine Pootine Transcript

This is a transcript of the January 31, 2024, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Red and Blue are talking.

Red: Do you think we rely on scatological humor too much?

Blue: Maybe.

Panel Two

Blue gives this serious thought. It is a nuanced answer.

Blue: I think sometimes it is easier to go down that path for a cheap laugh. Not that it makes us lazy. It helps us meet deadlines.

Panel Three

Red takes this position and acknowledges its validity.

Red: I suppose that is one way of looking at it.

Green (off screen): Hey guys!

Panel Four

Green approaches them. He is staring at his phone.

Green: I just sent you a link to a video about a hippo shitting so hard that his tail twirls around like a helicopter.

The struggle is real – messy.

Like a Storm Raging Inside You Transcript

This is a transcript of the May 11, 2021, RGBots comic.

Panel One

Green desperately clutched at his head. He is stressed and anxious about something. His discomfort is clear.

Green: Augh. Ugh. Son of a bitch.

Panel Two

Green leans over, trying to catch his breath.

Green: No, no. I’m fine. I’m just – Ugh.

Panel Three

We zoom out. We see Red has been standing nearby the whole time – Red comments on the situation.

Green: Goddamn it. Fuck.

Red: You’ve been a real drag today, Green.

Panel Four

Green raises his arm in frustration, shouting out loud.

Green: You try having your best day with a burning anus!

Excrelscior!

Rumbly in the Tumbly

This is a transcript of the March 4, 2021, RGBots comic.

Panel One:

Green is leaning toward Red.

Green: I am worried about my digestive health.

Red: Why is that?

Panel Two:

Green, still leaning in toward Red, has a finger under his lip in thought.

Green: It’s mostly due to my asshole. It keeps talking to me.

Panel Three:

Green places his hands on his hips. Red looks on.

Red: What? Really? What could it possibly be saying?

Panel Four:

Green’s eyes take up the whole panel.

Green: A lot of shit.